A Beautifully Maintained Resort and a Great Overall Experience But Joe Merchant Needs Work
Beach Is non-existent - no easy access though we saw 2 people from the resort in the ocean. It is ostensibly impossible to even walk the shore. We did hear they plan some kind of reclamation in the next months but this will be a formidable task due to unrelenting climate change/rising seas levels and random hurricanes. Any photos you see of sand, loungers or palapas are seriously out of date. They do have a number of labourers daily raking and sieving sea grass or whatever the plant material is and wheelbarrowing it off site to keep it from piling up and rotting against the sea wall. Think Sisyphus rolling a boulder uphill. Grounds and facilities are exceptionally clean and well maintained. Kudos to all the hard working people behind the scene that keep the resort so pristine. Garbage and leftover foods must be disposed of continuously as we only saw a couple of flies, bugs and very few birds looking for opportunities to snag food. However, there were 2 days we were treated to pervasive sewage smells around the 5 o'clock Somewhere bar/west side of the resort. Restaurants - there are no a la carte breakfast locations. Room service is available 24 hours. The one time we used room service for a very simple order of two items, their scheduled delivery time of 20 minutes was off by almost 1/2 hour and the order we received was incorrect. There are 6 places to eat. The Boathouse - Buffet Great ambiance. Generally, there is good service. Our only issues were with the toasters which for the most part wouldn't toast - the conveyor belt wouldn't brown your bread no matter where you twist the dial (or brown only one side) which leaves a single 2 slice toaster for the entire buffet crowd. The second issue for us was that you have to stand in line to get to the omelet preparers in order to ask for bacon which they then distribute. We only ate breakfast there and can't attest to lunch or dinner offerings or service. JWB Steakhouse Reservations are recommended but we found they can usually accommodate walk-ins within an hour. The standard meat menu (no additional cost) is limited. The sirloin, while on the thin side, is usually done to perfection. The shrimp cocktail is excellent. Jimmy is a friendly and helpful server. 8 out of 10. There are some major disconnects between the Karisma Hotel website menu and the on-site scanned menu - for example the Karisma Hotel website shows 4 cuts of beef including a tenderloin but the QR code scanned menu only shows one - the sirloin and all other cuts are additional payments. Frank and Lola's Italian Restaurant. Reservations are recommended but we found they can usually accommodate walk-ins within an hour. Edwin is an excellent server. Eddy is in charge of the pizza oven and baking. He is a performing artist and a pleasure to watch his preparation of the pizza dough and the baking of the wood fired pizzas. These are some of the best pizzas we have ever eaten. 10 out 0f 10 rating. We recommend the leek soup, the chicken parmesan, the salmon, the cannoli and tiramisu. Edwin puts on a photo worthy show of preparing the sauces for the cannoli and tiramisu. A special thanks also to Oscar, the head chef, for preparing excellent meals. License to Chill Grill and Bar- lunch only - pub food such as hamburgers and hot dogs - outdoor dining only - the food arrives warm - think the temperature of a Costco hot dog. Landshark (sports bar and pub)- lunch and dinner - same menu - some live entertainment in the evenings - essentially pub food - usually very busy and service can be slow at peak times. The Landshark brewery serves up a couple of good micro brews. Roberto went the extra mile - I asked for a glass of milk which they don't stock but he ordered a glass from room service delivered to the restaurant. Thank you Roberto. Joe Merchant and Provisions - coffee shop and consumables - you get water only in your room mini-fridge and you "purchase" beer, pop, chips and chocolate bars with a generous allocation of points you receive at check-in and are deducted via your wrist room key. The coffee shop is mostly understaffed from morning to closing, definite English language deficiencies and the hot liquid cup lids are not always well secured by the staff - check your cup lids! The staff have not been especially friendly nor accommodating and are definitely not good ambassadors for the Karisma/Margaritaville brand. The coffee shop has a very negative vibe with no welcoming greeting nor wishes for a good day or evening or even a thank you. They have no bags if you wish to take a number of items and will pile your items onto a very small plate/saucer - Jenga style. We were flatly refused when we asked if we could have a cup in which to take a number of cookies back to the room. We did experience much rudeness from the coffee shop staff and did report our complaints to the front desk while still at the hotel. These issues as mentioned were elevated to the front desk and we did let front desk know that the coffee shop was a topic of conversation around the pool and not in a good way. This is about the only resort we have been to in which ice cream isn't being offered at the coffee shop (you get it at the buffet). None of the bars or restaurants offer coffee or tea with or after meals so if you are a non alcoholic drinker only water is available with your meals also with the coffee shop shutting down coffee/tea service at 9:30pm, your coffee/tea fix is limited to room service. It is a tad misleading that posted shop hours are to 10:00 pm but only point products and paid products are offered from 9:30pm to 10:00 pm. Coffee shop hours are not indicated on the front doors of the shop. I must say we have done a lot of travelling to Mexico, Jamaica, St Martin and the Dominican Republic and the coffee shop at this resort has been by far the worst we have even encountered. Pools 4 pools all of which are under used and quiet with the exception of the 5 o'clock main pool which plays mellow music until noon and then things liven up with water aerobics, games and much louder more contemporary music. Great enthusiastic and energetic staff. We found no shortage of towels. There are a number of spots on the pool floor where the top coat of concrete product - about 1/2 thick - has broken up and delaminated. The pieces are somewhat like stepping on a Leggo brick. Our understanding is that repair work is scheduled in the coming weeks. Rooms with swim outs link to two of the quieter pools. The pools are not heated which was fine with us however a number of older clients were not happy with the cooler water and also were concerned about getting cuts on the feet from the broken tiles/concrete that were not covered by the mats. Smoking 2 official spots - one out front of the main lobby and one in the rear right hand corner behind the Landshark. Unofficially on your balcony but be respectful if you neighbours are using their balconies. Bars No Cointreau, Drambuie or Grand Marnier so no Rusty Nails. They have bourbon in the main lobby bar - the Salted Rim - if Old Fashioned are requested. Rafael and Orlando make a dynamite Brandy Alexander and Old Fashioned and Luis is such a friendly server always giving an infectious smile. The 5 O'clock Somewhere swim up and land side bars have friendly and very hardworking staff. The SOS pool bar, Landshark and Licence to Chill Bar round out the bars. Despite our Joe Merchant experience, all other issues are fairly minor and we are considering another visit at Easter.
